When I was first looking into paganism, the thing I wanted most was a coven of witches to help me learn and grow as a pagan. As I grew, however, I became more of a solitary practitioner. I do cast with my friends at times, but most of my work is done alone. It feels more spiritually right that way.
The first time I ever did any real casting work with other people, we used my altar in my bedroom at my old house. Next to my altar, there was a window that reached from the floor almost to the ceiling. It was nighttime, and the curtain over my window was open. As we set up the altar, I kept glancing out the window with a nervous sort of feeling. Whenever I had done solitary work before, my curtain had been closed.
Throughout that entire casting session, I felt the need to close the curtain, because I didn't want anyone peering in at us to see what we were doing. Mind you, this window faced my backyard, so there wasn't a huge chance of anyone walking by, but the feeling was still there. To this day, unless I'm casting outside, I never feel exactly right if I'm exposed by an open window. I've often wondered why this is.
I've never been one for past life regression, as it leaves too much to the human imagination, so here's one for past life speculation: when I get this nervous feeling, sentences such as "we shouldn't be seen," or "our craft should be hidden," surface in my mind. Oftentimes images will appear in my mind of other windows looking out on similar things, as if I were standing in a room centuries ago looking out on the evening before a casting session. Usually, I brushed these scenes and sentences off as nothing, but as it has happened so many times now, I have to wonder if I might be remembering pieces of a past life.
Because I am rooted in the old ways but feel the need to pave forward a road for others through a book of shadows of my craft, it would make sense that in a past life I was a witch of the burning times. They hid their craft from outsiders, but they passed it down through their bloodlines through personal books of shadows with instructions for spells and rituals, charms and brews. The difference is that they were forced to hide their craft from outsiders, while I am not. Religious freedom wasn't a huge thing back then, but these days it sure is.
I'm not telling you as fact that in a past life, I was a witch of the burning times. I am telling you that it feels like truth to me personally. Truthfully, we shall never know. I follow the Greek belief that on your journey through the Underworld, you must drink of the River Lethe and forget the memories you hold of your life. Through pathwork and meditation, it may be possible to recover some memories of past lives, but we will never truly know if these are true memories or if they are fabrications created by our own imaginations.
Be Seeing You!
|A river in Alaska called Lethe. Image found on Wikipedia.|